by Phillip McPhillipson
9.16.14
After searching for thousands of years, all of the heads of the major galaxies came together to name the most awesome man in the known universe. The criteria for the election was based mostly on: rock-paper-scissor record, robot dance routines, and pretend karate moves. The man's name is pronounced "Ahhhhhhhhhh", which is very similar to the sound you hear when you open a treasure chest of gold or find a huge pile of candy in a random field.